[365 Days of Extraordinary] Day 283 Transcript: The Daily Habits You Need To Boost Your Confidence In Stressful Times

by | Oct 15, 2020 | 365 Days of Facebook Lives

Hey everyone, Thursday, what a day. Isn’t it a fabulous day? Of course, it’s a fabulous day. I did a Live today, had the opportunity to do a Live on a friend of mine’s… In a friend of mine’s Facebook group, about the daily habits you need to remain confident in stressful times. And I thought, what the hell? I will do it again now for you guys. So it’s a longer one than normal, but I won’t do a lot of the pre-frame stuff that I did on the other Live today. So in the pre-frame, I talked about creating a good workspace for while you’re working at home in this time. Because most of us are going to be working from home, talked about emptying out your current schedule to allow for a new schedule, to help with your confidence and to help you get stuff done during this period.

I talked about brain dumping on your to dos switch. I know I’ve spoken to you about before. So if you go to samanthaleith.com and search brain dump, but basically it’s the writing out all the stuff in your head and then we can transfer it to your schedule. And if you’ve got any questions on those things, just send me a message and I’m more than happy to answer them. And one of the other things in the pre-frame was to make sure one of the things that helps with confidence, believe it or not is having all your essentials. So having enough food in the fridge, enough wine, enough… Have you picked up your clothes from the dry cleaner this last week? All of those kind of things, like making sure you’re set up. If you don’t have a stock of toilet paper, phone a friend that may have secretly got 24 packets in their laundry, just saying, I have heard rumors.

So now we’ll get to the tips. So I’ve got 10 tips for you to help the confidence during this time. Because one of the things about confidence is I talk about it being a muscle and we need to keep building it. But when we’re not interacting with people so much, when we’re not doing the things daily that make us feel good or going to be getting out, whatever it is those things that help keep that muscle going. When we stop doing those, that confidence breaks down really, really, really quickly. It’s like someone’s put a slow eating acid on us, so we don’t go straight away. But it seeps in and slowly but surely, we don’t feel as confident as we were even a week earlier, even days ago. So it’s really important that we keep that going.

So the first one I want to talk about, I should have got my props ready, sorry guys, is the daily journaling thing. Now this is a really, really big one to help with your confidence. I pinky promise. There’s a couple of things I’ve noticed when I created this list about things I hadn’t been so good at on a couple of days in the last couple of weeks. And the days I have not done my journaling practice or done half of it. Oh, they haven’t been great days. They really haven’t. And I was religious for like 16 months doing it every single day. And in the last couple of weeks, I’ve missed a few and I’ve half-assed on them. No, it doesn’t end well, it doesn’t end well. So I’ll just recap what I want you to do on those days.

Okay. Again, ignore the handwriting. So it’s free writing for a whole page, free writing for a whole page. And then I want you to write the five things you’re really grateful for. Got electricity. I didn’t stay in my pajamas all day. You write angel prayers, that’s beautiful Johnny. I love that. We’ve all got different habits and different things, that journaling practices that make us feel good. I share mine, whatever works for you, but just do something, okay. So the five gratitude, then the five big dreams. One of my big dreams is I am loved and in love, I don’t know when that’s going to happen. I’m not out there looking for anybody at the moment, but that’d be really nice one day, it’d be lovely to have that again. Then I write my five current goals. So the ones I’m working on in the next couple of months, and then I wrote the five goals for the year, and this is a little different to how I did it last year.

Last year, I did 10 big goals, but I’ve split it to the five, five, five now, which I’m liking. And then I write my five power statements. So it might be I’m enough, I’m ambitious, I’m healthy, I’m sexy, I am generous, I am committed, I am ambitious. Could be anything. But those five statements about how you want to feel. And then I’m actually writing my big overarching statement for my life once in it. But I’m not going to share that one. That’s my secret. So that’s the morning practice. So that’s tip number one. Tip number two, exercise. Honestly, get out there, do some form of exercise. Preferably if you can, in the fresh air, get some vitamin D we all need more vitamin D. We shouldn’t just be taking tablets. Vitamin D, we do need the sun, it’s a bit rainy today, but also do other exercises.

Pinterest -- You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily - Samantha LeithSo at the moment, everybody’s offering three weeks, three months on all their exercise apps and virtual classes. So depending on what you’re into there’s Centr by Liam Hemsworth, there’s BBX by Christmas Abbott. There’s… I can never say her, Kayla Itsines, the Australian girl. There’s Les Mill’s workouts. There’s so many of them. So just find one that works for you and do it. And just set aside like 20 minutes, 15 minutes, half an hour, whatever it takes. And then do some walking. Walking is by far the best.

I’m doing more walking at the moment. I’m loving it. Charlie’s a bit tired, Charlie’s like, another walk mum, you’re killing. Okay, tip, number three, get dressed for success. If you’re an artist, put on your art stuff that helps you paint and you get dirty and whatever. If you’re like me, you like a bit of bling, put on a little bit of bling. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but even doing these Lives. I think I’m more animated and probably more fun when I’m dressed properly. On the days where I’m like ah, whatever. I’ve got my gym gear on. I’ve never done one of my pajama… Have I done one? Haven’t done one in my pajamas.

But when I’m done, I do more. I get such a confidence injection. I really, really, really is. So get dressed for success even if, as I showed earlier, if it UGG means boots. It wasn’t working out. So UGG boots is okay, but I’m dressed well. Number four, of my 10 tips, meditation. Now for me, I’m not a good ohm person. I need an app. So I do energizing meditation in the morning or it might be a future projection of thoughts or life meditation. And then in the evenings, I’ve been using apps and doing hypnosis meditations. That get me going really easily. That’s my way of meditating. But taking that time to do it is really important. Taking that time to… Even if someone’s talking to me in my ear, it’s still getting me like, ah.

If you can and if you’re one of those people, go sit on a bench in the park, not on the beach, because the beach is closed. Away from people obviously, sit in your garden and do the meditation that way, whatever works for you. If you’ve got a cushion, not good at doing it in bed anymore, because I fall asleep. So I do you need to get up and actually do it. Okay, there’s lots of apps, Calm, Omvana, Headspace, you name it, there’s a gazillion of them. Some of your favorite people might actually have some meditations that you can download and you get to listen to their voice, which is another cool thing. So I know Denise Duffield-Thomas has got some, I know Lewis Howes has got some, there’s so many of them. So got to any of the people that you follow and see if they have a meditation. Another good trick, which I’m about to do.

I haven’t done yet, but I want to do it. Is recording my own meditation. So using voice memos and actually just record my own visualization exercise, using my own voice and use that as a tool. I think that could be really cool. I’ve heard people talk about it. So I’m going to give that a whirl. I will let you know how I go. Tip number five, how to keep your confidence up while you’re doing this. So remember the exercises I’ve talked about in the past about doing a brain dump and all the things, the to dos that you’ve got to get done. I want you to make the time every day to do one of them. So a lot of people I’m seeing are going, oh great, I’m using all this time working from home to do… By the time they get to the end of locked lockdown.

They’re going to be exhausted, or they’re going to feel like shit because they didn’t achieve it all. Or they’re going to be ragged, just like no, no, no, no, no, no. Now’s not the time to do that. Now’s the time to pick one thing a day to do. And by doing that one thing a day it’s like that extra set of pushups, is going to help with your confidence. Just one thing, if you can get another one done awesome, but make the space to do one. Just make the space to do one. Number seven, read. I want you to read some crap. And I mean that in the nicest possible way, I want you to ignore all my business building books here. I want you to pick up some fiction. I want you to read Twilight, Harry Potter.

Not even a Kardashian biography, because they’ll probably have other things that… I want you to get lost in fiction, get lost walking in the woods or in the ocean or those words. Fiction is an art obviously, but reading fiction actually helps boost your creativity and having a boosted creativity, helps build your confidence. So it’s this awesome thing. And it will give you that half an hour, hour, 45 minutes, 15 minutes, if that’s all you want to do. Where you just get lost in something, it’s almost meditative, tricky word meditative, but I encourage you to just pick up fiction and read it. Now I read fiction on my Kindle Tales of the City, oh my God, awesome fiction. I read on my Kindle and I read non-fiction in paper or hardback. So yeah, pick up some fiction. I’m doing UK, detective books at the moment, which are fabulously fun, great characters. Okay number eight. I want you to do something fun, like crazy ass fun. Elodie and I are going to play Twister this afternoon?

She might have fun. I don’t know if I’m going to have fun but anyway, we’re going to have fun doing it. Get out of Rubik’s Cube, play Monopoly, get onto Tik Tok, do something that’s just not your normal thing, but is actually fun. Because by doing something that’s a little bit fun and a little bit out of the norm, you increase your confidence. Imagine how good you’ll feel after the end of all this. You’re like, oh my God, I’ve mastered the Rubik’s Cube, I am a legend. I declare a thumb war. But you know what I mean, do something just random and fun because there’s so much seriousness going on at the moment. Number nine, I want you to pick up the phone and call someone. So in my seven day confidence challenge, I’d talk about how to strike up a conversation with a random stranger.

Now’s not the time to be doing that. And I don’t suggest just dialing numbers randomly and talking to whoever answers, although could be, if you wan to, I don’t know… Bit Bart Simpson-ish, but pick up the phone and call an old client, just randomly call someone in your phone that you haven’t spoken to for ages. Go through your Facebook friends list and go, oh my God, I haven’t spoken to them for ages, message them, get their phone number. If you don’t have it, then call them, have a conversation. Because, by doing it with someone… I’m not talking about calling your bestie here, because that is not exercising a new muscle. Calling your bestie or calling your family is something you probably do a lot. So that’s not going to help with your confidence. But calling someone that’s not in that circle really helps your confidence.

Now’s also the time, if you have a business that either has a service or a product that is essential or important, or cool in this period. Now’s also the time to let go of any of that baggage about cold calling people. Because if you’re offering something of value, cold calling someone with something now is a great confidence builder. Even if you get a no. If you’re doing something that’s really spammy, no, don’t do it. Not going to suggest that at all. But if it is really a value to people in this time, yep. Break through that barrier, pick up the phone and call people, really important. Number 10, 10 little piggies. Let’s try something new. I want you to try something new. Now this could be, brewing your own ginger beer. It could be hula-hooping. It could be, don’t try to light those fire tricks at home.

Probably not a good time to do that. But try something really new that you’ve had in the back of your brain as an, ah if I ever get the time I’d like to do that or I would. Well, now you have the time. So do it. No one’s going to be watching, or better yet, post the videos of trying something new and you can encourage people to do the same thing. And people are kind during this period. If you want to give Facebook Lives a go, go and do it. I will be all encouraging. You know how hard it was for me to start? And now that muscle is built. It’s not a problem for me to jump on now. So try something new. Now, they are my 10 tips for remaining confident in stressful times. Why the voice, I don’t know. I’m going to give you a bonus tip.

Okay, the bonus tip is. Did you know that when you are, let’s say intimate with somebody, you get all these extra hormones that go through your body and you feel good. So cortisol, dopamine… I keep saying oxycodone. You know what I mean. Whenever you get those boosts of those hormones, you feel fantastic and feeling fantastic is the ultimate confidence booster. So even though it’s really stressful at the moment, if you have a partner, I want you to be arranging time to have a cuddle or a snog or a bonk. There. I said, I said, bonk on a Facebook Live. I think for the second time today. And if you’re single and unable to mingle, because that would be inappropriate at the moment. Do not forget the art of self-pleasure. Because those same hormones get released, which make you feel good.

So there we go. My 10 plus one one habits that you need to practice every single day. Yeah, I said daily guys. I said daily to help remain confident and even boost your confidence while all this is going on. So what are they? Number one, you’re journaling every day, every morning, the journaling practice. If you need to know what I do, send me a message, I’ll send you the list. Number two, exercise. Number three, get dressed for success. Number four, meditate. Number five, do something from your brain dump of to-do lists every single day. Number six, limit your time on social media news and email.

Oh, I forgot to… I didn’t tell you that bit, oops. Backtrack, number six. Yeah, get off social media, once you’ve watched this Live and news and email. Check them a couple of times a day. I’ve four periods a day where I do social media and two a day where I do news. Don’t keep refreshing Worldometer that some people are doing. Because that will totally suck every ounce of confidence out of you. It really will. And it’s so hard to rebuild that amount of drain. So get off that. Number seven, read something fictitious. Number eight, do something fun, maybe cut your children’s hair. Number nine, pick up the phone. Number 10, try something new, bake that four cheese soufflé you’ve always wanted to bake. And number 11, have a cuddle every day, it’s good for you. Bye, stay well everybody.

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