Does this sound familiar? Do you often find yourself trapped in a cycle of negative self-talk, battling with your own thoughts and struggling to see a way out? Maybe you’ve been told to simply ignore those voices, to push them away and focus on positive thinking. But let me ask you, how has that been working for you? Ignoring the voices in your head only amplifies the pain, leaving you feeling even more defeated and stuck. It’s time to stop avoiding and start embracing those voices, to truly understand them and harness their power for personal growth and transformation.
Our internal voices shape our beliefs, behaviours, and how we interact with the world. They can either propel us towards growth and self-improvement, or plunge us into self-doubt and stagnation. It’s essential to recognize and understand these voices, not as external entities, but facets of our own selves.
Mentioned in this Episode
In this episode, you will be able to:
- Experience the power of tuning into your inner dialogue and its transformative role in shaping your reality.
- Convert destructive thoughts into constructive affirmations that propel your personal growth journey.
- Uncover the magic of journaling and self-reflection in enhancing self-awareness and growth.
- Delineate the profound effects of your inner voices on your self-esteem and confidence levels.
- Learn to engage with your internal voices to derive insights leading you to a rewarding life. List 2:
If thinking about having voices in our heads makes you think you need to call your psychiatrist or someone’s going to lock you up and if you actually tell people what’s going on inside your mind, they are going to think you are loopy loo, you are wrong. You’re absolutely wrong. We all have voices in our head. – Samantha Leith
Discover Your Inner Voice: Unlocking Your Potential for Success
Discover the transformative power of listening to and understanding the voices in our heads in this thought-provoking episode of The Samantha Leith Podcast. Join me, Samantha Leith, as I delve into the impact of negative self-talk and how it affects our mindset and self-esteem. Through personal anecdotes and insights, you’ll learn practical techniques to transform negative thoughts into positive ones. Using tools like journaling and non-judgmental self-reflection, we can gain self-awareness and tap into the underlying messages these voices convey.
The resources mentioned in this episode are:
- Follow Samantha Leith on social media (Instagram: @samanthaleith)
- Purchase the 90-day Extraordinary Journal for self-reflection and personal development.
- Check out Samantha Leith’s website for more resources and information.
- Support Samantha Leith by subscribing to her podcast and leaving a review.
- Explore topics related to personal development and self-reflection.
- Consider joining a community or group focused on personal growth and achievement.
- Look for ways to incorporate consistency into your own life and goals.
- Reflect on the voices in your own head and how they impact your mindset and actions.
- Practice self-compassion and kindness when addressing your inner critic.
- Take action on the lessons and insights gained from listening to both positive and negative voices within yourself.
Timestamped summary of this episode:
00:00:03 – Welcome to the Samantha Leith podcast with me. Samantha Leith. I have a passion for exploring anything and everything that can help us to be extraordinary. Each week I’m going to dive into a topic and explore it extensively. Because if there’s something that makes for a better life, I want to learn about it and more importantly, share it.
00:00:23 – And hey, you may just get the odd song thrown in. There’ll be deep conversations, fun and frivolity helpful tools for you to add to your life straight away. Random musings about anything from coffee to sex and information that may just blow your mind. This is a podcast for dreamers, believers, action takers and achievers. It’s personal development, but not as you know it.
00:00:50 – Hello and welcome to episode 28 of the Samantha Lee Podcast. Firstly, thank you so much for joining me in listening to this week’s podcast, well titled it’s The Two Bobs and I’ll explain that more in detail. It’s about the voices in our head and ironically, what’s made me want to do this episode is my lack of consistency with this very podcast was one of the reasons. Now, if you’ve been following me for a while, you’ll know that I like to pick a word for the year and my word for 2023 is and was and we’ve got another nearly half a year to go of it is consistency and in terms of a lot of things. But in particular, I’ll address this podcast.
00:01:40 – I’ve been like consistent for a batch and then ghosts, then consistent, then ghosts and I’ve really, really been horrible to myself about that. Horrible. Like if a friend said the kind of things I’ve said to myself in my head about my lack of consistency with this podcast, I don’t think I’d be very close to them anymore. But still we are horrible to ourselves. Now firstly, I’ll address the why I haven’t been consistent.
00:02:17 – Various reasons ADHD being one of them where when you struggle with executive function and I’m going to do more podcasts on these kind of topics as well because I think it’s really important. But when you struggle with an executive function, one of the things we have trouble doing is execution of tasks that don’t give us like a huge dopamine hit or they’re not very exciting or we don’t really want to do them or something else happens and we struggle to actually finish that task. So regardless of the fact that I sat down and made a list of all the different topics I was going to do for a six month period, when I’ve had those days where it happens and I haven’t been able to sit down and actually record it. And then I go, okay, I’ll do it tomorrow, and we’ll still get it up in time. But then I get to tomorrow and I’m too tired or something happens, and then I’m like, oh, well, it’s too late, because now it’s not going to go out on the right day.
00:03:15 – So then I’m going to look hopeless. So what’s the point? Blah, blah, blah, round and round we go. And I’ll be honest, this year for many reasons, has been hard for myself and for very many members of my family with deaths and illnesses and all sorts of things. Charlie’s doing better, by the way.
00:03:34 – Thank you. For people that send me messages and things like that. It’s ten weeks post her spinal stroke now and she’s walking and running and stuff, but she still pees everywhere, so she’s very consistent in that. But we will get there with that, I think, I hope. Cross my fingers.
00:03:52 – Anyway, back to this podcast and what is it all about?
00:03:59 – Well, first I’m going to start with going back in the way back machine to a story about my singing teachers. So when I first joined the Australian opera as a young Wheeler of eleven and a half or twelve, somewhere around there, they recommended different singing teachers for us to work with. And one of the teachers was a gentleman by the name of Robert and he was one of Australia’s best singing teachers. And I would schlep myself from the eastern suburbs of Sydney to the North Shore. Public transport wasn’t like it is now and to go to these lessons.
00:04:39 – And he spoke to my parents and the AO and myself about the fact that I had this powerful Metso voice and I had this ability. He in fact said I could be one of Australia’s greatest divas. And I would go to these lessons and I have practiced at home and boxed things out on the piano and practiced and I thought I’d done a good job. And he would say to me, hopeless. No.
00:05:04 – Hopeless. Terrible. No, stop. No. You’re never going to get anywhere if you can’t improve this.
00:05:10 – No. Samantha. Terrible. No. What do you think you’re doing?
00:05:14 – I’m wasting my time. Like all those kind of things would come out and I would leave those lessons and I would walk from his place to the train station crying or thinking, what’s the point? I obviously can’t do this. Everyone was clearly pretending when they said I could be a singer, even though at that point I’d been paid all those irrelevant I came away from those lessons just feeling so broken. Okay, I persevered for a while, I can’t remember how long, six months, a year?
00:05:46 – Can’t remember what it was, probably about a year, I reckon. And then I was like, I can’t do this anymore. I didn’t want to go. I felt so hopeless. Like, what was the point of me doing this when every time I did something that wasn’t good enough?
00:06:02 – So they recommended another teacher, his name was Bob. Ironic, I know, and I would again Schlip myself across Sydney, even further to Bob’s place for singing lessons. And again one of Australia’s greatest singing teachers. But he had a different approach and I would do something and he would go, it’s okay, Sam, but I think you can do a little bit better. You nearly nailed it.
00:06:25 – Okay. If you do this extra bit in practice at home, I think you’re going to get there. Okay. No, I know you can do more. Come on, give me more now.
00:06:33 – Almost there. But always encouraging. And I left those lessons thinking, I got it, I got it. And if you can see me now, I’m doing like that jiggle dancing, I got it, I got it. I would come away feeling inflated and feeling like I did have potential and there was possibility.
00:06:55 – Now you might be thinking, why on earth is meant for telling us stories about singing teachers? Because I’ve come to realize that the two voices in my head that primarily stick up and rear their heads are the two Bobs. It’s Robert and Bob. And if I flick through my journal and read what I’m writing, some days I’m Robert and I’m nasty as to myself and other days I’m Bob and I’m like, yeah, you know, yesterday wasn’t and it’s not excusing what’s happened, but it’s just more encouraging. Yes, we’ve had setbacks, but we can keep going.
00:07:33 – I think you can do better. I think I can do better. All of those kind of things now, yes, I’m also a Gemini, so I’ve probably got those two voices in my head as well. And there are probably others as well, but I haven’t given them given them names because these ones are just so clear to me. Now, if thinking about having voices in our heads makes you think you need to call your psychiatrist or someone’s going to lock you up and if you actually tell people what’s going on inside your mind, they are going to think you are loopy loo, you are wrong.
00:08:11 – You’re absolutely wrong. Sorry about that. Sorry, not sorry. We all have voices in our head, okay? We’ve heard the stories about and I’m obviously not a psychiatrist and I don’t want to go down that we have it’s been kind of like Hollywood eyes so that people that have voices in their head know, listening to some great leader tell them to do X, Y or Z.
00:08:38 – It’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about those little inner voices that kick away at us during the day or they boost us a little bit or they’re like, yeah, you can do that. Samantha, what do you think you’re doing? Nope. Put that chocolate down now.
00:08:51 – Read the chocolate, it’s fine. Do you really want to read that book or do you want to go watch Netflix? Like all those little things that we do, you’ve worked out hard enough. You’ve post that post, do the thing, call a friend, go to the party. All of those things that happen in our minds, we have this dialogue that just goes around and around and around all day for all of us.
00:09:17 – Our minds are very busy things. And as many of us say, the minute we can manage our mind, we can manage our lives. And those voices are going to continue to be a part of what is going on for us. It’s a natural part of human cognition and self reflection, okay? They are always going to be there.
00:09:38 – So what I want to talk about now is how can we work with them instead of having them working against us? Now, what I recognized in my work with the two Bobs in real life was that my personality type, who I am, I need encouragement and I need support in order to grow. The minute you tell me I haven’t done something quite good enough or I have, that almost that modern major General kind of what I think of Pirates of Pinzance, I back away, I shrink. Whereas others, if you tell them no, hopeless, do it again, they are going to do it again, and they are going to do it just at the absolute next amazing freaking level, and it’s going to make them feel incredible. And that might be you, okay?
00:10:38 – That might be you. And sometimes we develop these voices or they become part of who we are based on things that have happened in our childhood. Bingo. Didn’t everything that happens in our life happen because of something in our childhood?
00:10:57 – Maybe not. Even maybe as a kid, I needed a little bit more support, I needed a little bit more encouragement in order to feel good and to do things, okay, that’s just me. So I’ve developed the habit of having that voice. But when I’m in a mode of really not feeling good enough, although I haven’t done a good enough job, robert comes back to slap me down. And I can even if you have so many secrets here, I can even almost use this voice when I’m talking out loud to other people.
00:11:37 – And I know my daughter has picked me up on this. She’ll say to me, how was your day? Very simple question. And I’ll go, I had a great day, but I didn’t do. Now, that might seem like a tiny, tiny thing, but that is that.
00:11:55 – But when I know when I’m putting a but in a sentence about something I either have or haven’t done or want to do or need to do or any of those kind of goal related doing kind of things, if I put a button to that sentence, I know Robert is popping up to rear his ugly head and tell me I’m hopeless. That but is me switching from Sam and Bob mode to Sam and Robert mode. I can do anything because if you’ve listened to me for long enough or followed me on socials at Smithlouth, by the way, you know I’m a pretty positive person. I’m pretty good at finding the positive in anything and everything. But I do know, and that’s not robert, that part should come up with another word.
00:12:42 – And I also know that life is 50 50. So we’re going to have negative moments and positive moments and grumpy moments and sad moments, and all the moments, and I welcome all the moments. However, I know that when I’m talking about something like that, if I put that butt in, that’s me going into that you’re hopeless mode. So I’m really trying to work on stopping that inner voice and listening more to Bob. Nice Bob.
00:13:11 – Well, they’re both nice. They just had different teaching styles. And actually, that’s an interesting point. Both of these voices, like both of the Bobs in my life are good for me in some way. Both of these men were good men.
00:13:27 – Both of these men were good singing teachers. They just had different styles. So these voices within me, as I recognize them, they’re there to tell me, teach me, show me different things. What I need to do is recognize them in the moment for what they are and not think. I can only listen to the positive and ignore the negative because the negative sometimes gives me really, really good lessons.
00:13:55 – Okay, if I look into my journal, and if you buy the 90 day extraordinary journal, there’s a self reflection part on the bottom of each page. And a couple of times I’ve written things in there, like, based on one of the negative things, I’ve said to myself, why am I saying that negatively? What did I get out of not doing that task? What did I get? What didn’t I get?
00:14:21 – I can ask myself more questions if I’m willing to listen to those voices. Now, this is a really specific example because I can literally picture the people in my life, in real life, and how they have kind of transferred themselves into Mabarine. Sounds really freaky, doesn’t it? And you can probably do the same, and you might not want to make them real people. When you’re recognizing the voices, you can make them characters.
00:14:55 – And I’ve just had a total mental blank. What is that movie with, like, sadness and happiness and anger? Oh, no, I can’t believe I’ve forgotten the name of it. I can picture it. And it’s all these different characters.
00:15:10 – Yep. No, can’t remember. You can give the voices in your head. Little names like Sweet talking Sally. Penelope positive Grumpy, gary tenacious.
00:15:28 – Tessa. I like alliteration. But you can come up with anything. And when you can personalize the voice, it makes it easier for you to then identify what that voice is saying. You can then kind of connect with it and think, like I mentioned earlier, well, what is it really trying to say?
00:15:53 – What am I not listening to? What do I need to listen to? And they’re really great opportunities for us to do some journaling work on that and really look at them in a nonjudgmental way. That’s the important thing. I’m not sitting here because with the voices I’ve got, if I started writing and journaling or thinking about what those voices are saying to me in a judgmental way, I’d be, oh, Samantha, you are completely bonkers having these voices in your head.
00:16:25 – Ridiculous. You don’t need to listen to them, just listen to yourself. Those voices are ourselves, okay? So listen to them. Non judgmentally to help you create more self awareness.
00:16:38 – You want to be able to identify what that voice is trying to tell you. And chances are, if you’re like me, it’s going to come back again and again and again till we get that message. Because quite often us humans, we don’t get the message the first time around. I know you might find that really surprising. Yeah.
00:17:01 – We quite often need to be slapped in the face by that proverbial fish from those old slapsticky movies lots of times before we actually get the message. So how else can we work with these voices? One of the things I want you to do, which I’ve started doing more of, is transforming that voice. Okay? So Robert’s popped up and he’s given me that negative thought and it’s negative negative, and I want to transform it to something positive.
00:17:36 – Now, chances are a bit like the whole I hate my body, I love my body. It’s really hard to shift from one to the other, but we can take it in steps. So I’m going to take that negative thought of I’m the world’s most hopeless podcaster because I can’t even get my crap together to do that consistently. Two, I have been consistent in stages. There have been many things going on in my life with a better plan.
00:18:07 – I can be more consistent. If I take care to make more space in my calendar, that will help me with my consistency. What do I need to do to be more consistent? And also the world hasn’t fallen apart because I wasn’t consistent. So I can also do some tapping on it, which will help me switch it to positive.
00:18:33 – So if you’ve ever done any EFT, can’t really do it on a blog post. I mean a podcast, have a bit of a Google and just use your fingers and tap on the correct points. And I’ll say even though I haven’t been consistent with my podcast this year, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Even though in some stages I have been consistent with my podcast, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Even though I am working on being more consistent.
00:19:02 – Get the picture? I can smooth it through from being negative to being positive. That’s another way of doing it. We want to have this thought replacement, okay? And some of them you will be able to jump, but some of them you won’t be able to jump.
00:19:18 – This change is a process and you’re not going to be able to switch off the voices in your head like that and I don’t think we want to. I really think they’re great guideposts for us, but we do want to be able to work with them and be able to move them through feeling more better about ourselves. And again, as I said, if you having in my example a voice that is that more kind of dictatorial voice is good for you, then by all means welcome that voice. And you maybe want to change the sweet talking voice to be a little harsher. That might be what you need to do.
00:20:00 – So you do the same steps on how to do that thought replacement, but going the other way, if you get my drift. Okay, so it’s a lot you’ve listened to the voices, you’ve kind of heard what they’re saying to you. You’ve kind of worked out why you’ve got these particular voices. Maybe you’ve given them names, maybe you can even picture them in your head. And then you’ve done some exercises, whether it be through meditation or visualization or journaling or tapping, but going through that process of going from a negative to a positive experience with that voice and really understanding what it’s trying to teach you and help you with.
00:20:41 – I want you to know that there are so many benefits to doing this, okay? You’re going to be able to transform that internal monologue that you have. You really will be. You’ll be able to increase your self esteem, your confidence, even like those moments where Eliddy’s picked me up on my butts when I answer questions, me being able to explain to her why I’ve said that and be open about what is going on, et cetera, is improving our relationship, has improved our relationship. We continue to have so many conversations about all sorts of things and one of them being why we do that thing with that juggle in our head with voices.
00:21:25 – Another thing is it also when we really listen to these voices and understand them can give us a really great insight into how we’re going with our goals, our values, our mission, all of that kind of biggest picture stuff in our life. And if we pay attention, it can help us to get a lot better aligned with those which is what we want. Okay? We all want to be more in align with where we want to go. So in closing for today, I want to offer to you that you’re not a nutbag.
00:22:06 – That’s it. I could end the podcast here now. Can’t I joking. You really are not a nutbag. We all have these voices in our head.
00:22:16 – They’re guideposts, they’re signs, they’re warnings, they’re love letters to ourselves. They’re just little different snippets of who we are. And this clever thing that we’ve got called a brain allows them to come to the forefront. So don’t knock them down. Don’t think you’re an idiot or losing your mind.
00:22:40 – Listen, pay attention to what the voices are teaching you. Learn how to switch any of the negative ones to positive. And on the flip side of that, if you’ve got a voice that keeps telling you no, you want to go and spend $100,000 on lotto tickets, you might want to not listen to that voice and ask yourself why you’re thinking that, okay? You might want to go the other way. Because sometimes those really positive, encouraging voices aren’t good for us either, okay?
00:23:11 – So listen to both of them. Don’t ignore any of them, and learn more about yourself as you get to know them, okay? Get to know the voices and get to know yourself and learn what you need to listen to and to do in order to actually live that extraordinary freaking life that I keep talking about, okay? So remember, we’ve all got the power to change this internal dialogue. Listen to it, change it, and therefore change our lives.
00:23:43 – Okay? So I want to encourage you to not blanket the voices in your head. Don’t try and numb them away from you. Just make them a part of you, because they are a part of you. Okay?
00:24:00 – So let’s go enjoy our lives. Dance, sing, play with the voices in our heads, okay? And if you’ve got some really interesting characters and the voices in your head, I’d love to hear what they are. Send me a message. I love getting DMs at Smithleton.
00:24:14 – Everything. Let me know who your favorite inner voice is, what they look like, what their name is, what they teach you. I want to know all that stuff. And I want to say again, thank you so much for tuning in. Ironically, I really enjoyed doing these podcasts, which again, makes me go, what have I do them?
00:24:35 – But they are now absolutely scheduled in my calendar, so we should be on track now. But they are moving to a Monday instead of coming out on the Friday, they will be coming out on the Monday, like this one. So have a fantastic day. If you liked this episode, take a screenshot, pop it on the socials tag. Me would love to see it leave a they’re very, very helpful.
00:24:55 – Don’t really understand how it works, but I’ve been told they’re very helpful. And until next week, have a fabulous week and stay freaking extraordinary. My friends, thank you for listening to this week’s episode of the Samantha Leith Podcast. If you enjoyed this episode and want to dive deeper into the world of personal development and what’s possible for you, then I’d love to invite you to join the club. It’s my monthly membership designed to guide and support you with the tools and the coaching you need to be extraordinary.
00:25:28 – Head on over to Samanthaleith.com theclub for more information. I’d love to see you on the inside.